It may be my imagination, but I have been noticing a pattern in the world. When good things happen, there is generally someone that stands up tall and says, “that was me,” However, when bad things or failures happen, it is a lonely affair with no one stepping up to claim responsibility. The failure is blamed on circumstances, the other guy, the opponent, or the bad guys.
“Success has many fathers while failure is an orphan.”- English Proverb
I want to suggest a bold alternative that may revolutionize your results. What if you decided to accept responsibility for all of the results and circumstances in your life? Embrace that you have designed your life to generate this exact moment exactly where you are today. Please note, that would include any and all of the negative stuff.
Use this shift in framing to change your orientation to the circumstances that you encounter. Given that you are generating the results, it makes it incumbent upon you to redesign your life when you are not generating the outcomes that you desire. That may be a simple tweak or a complete reengineering effort.
Who better to be responsible for the outcomes in your life… than you?
Ideally, this would also lead us to be open minded and curious when our outcomes are not what we hoped. We could focus on learning instead of on being right. It revolutionizes conversations when they are not about winning the point, but instead can be about learning from one another. That might require you to let go of defending your ego. However, the benefits in lifelong learning are well worth it.
Would it even be possible to see what happens as an aid to our ultimate success? Switch to seeing the people and circumstances in our lives as the conduit to our growth. Could it be that these quotes might be pointing us exactly in this direction?
“That which doesn’t kill me makes me stronger.”- Nietzsche
“The impediment to action advances the action. What stands in the way becomes the way.”- Marcus Aurelius
Why would all this be powerful? It allows us to develop our internal locus of control (for more on that topic read my article “Deeply Understand Your Control/Power”). It makes us feel more powerful, ensures proactivity and spurs us to action. All of that… adds up to increased odds of success!
Just my opinion. What do you think?